Well hey there. ;)

I’m gonna stop with the depressing rants everytime I get on here. :D You want updates of my pretty much awesome life right now?

You’re gonna get them anyway. ;D

I am officially the girlfriend of Mr Craig Hough. The same guy I have completely been utterly in love with for the past 2 years. He loves me and I love him and, dare I say it, we are gonna live happily ever after? :P Haha. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not delusional. But I’m happy. And that’s the main thing right?

If you can’t tell by that God Damn AWESOME picture ^^^^ I have lost quite a bit of weight recently. And THAT makes me even more happy! :) Not to mention I can do lay back with no hands at pole!!!

Also, I’m moving into a new flat on Saturday. Its beautiful. I can bvarely wait.

And my Mum is fine.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~!

I’m actually terrfied of being this happy. Surely there is a catch? :D

Hey guys. I am so sorry I haven’t been around although I’m sure none of you noticed.

My life has pretty much fallen apart.

I’ve put back on most of the weight I lost due to stress.

I’m homeless, which pretty much sucks. My life was so brilliant when I lived with Josh but due to his sister I can no longer live there so I now have to pay for everything myself. At the moment I am back living with my parents which considering I moved out at 16 because I hated it so much, I’m not particularly enjoying it. I’m looking for a flat which will most likely be more than I can afford if I don’t wanna live in some shitty flat in the poor part of town which I really don’t want to go back to.

I’m finding it really hard to get a job. Seriously, what am I supposed to do? You need experiance to get a job but you can’t get experiance until you HAVE a job. I’ve applied for a club promoting job that I REALLY want to get because I love everyone who works there and they will employ me even with lilac hair. I can’t work full time because I’m struggling with college enough without working.

I’m terrified of losing all my friends. My 3 best friends have boyfriends who are also best friends including my boyfriend Josh. Not a single one of them have much going for them in their life. I hate to say it but I don’t see any of us being with our boyfriends within a year. Some of us are going to Uni this year and some of us are going nowhere. I’m just carrying on with college trying to sort out my life.

And I guess what really hurts is the fact that I don’t think I am in love with Josh anymore. He doesn’t have a job and has no intention of ever getting one. He would much prefer to spend his life smoking weed. He doesn’t treat me like a girlfriend. Even when I lived with him we were just two best friends who happened to sleep in the same bed and occasionally kissed each other. How am I supposed to hold that together now we don’t even live with each other? He doesn’t even care enough about himself to bath more than once a fortnight. How am I supposed to want to be with someone like that? It, of course, also doesn’t help that I’m pretty much in love with someone else and I have been for a very long time. I cheated on Josh a long time ago with this guy and we decided that we would just make really good friends. But those feelings never really went away. Fuck this.

Fuck this.

Fuck life.

How am I supposed to get through all that crap?

Fuck it.